


Regret

by FrostfireEzreal



Series: A Thousand Stars [5]
Category: League of Legends
Genre: Blood, Child Death, Death, M/M, Odyssey AU, mass killing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-08-14
Packaged: 2020-08-23 18:15:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20247169
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrostfireEzreal/pseuds/FrostfireEzreal
Summary: Oh, the things he’d done to become Ordinal. Those memories haunted him; sitting in the back of his mind as a constant reminder of his desperation for power. Usually they wouldn’t have bothered him, no matter how gruesome and immoral they were, but after marrying Jarvan and having a family of his own he looked back on the atrocities he’d committed in disgust. One instance in particular that he recalled so vividly was a mission he was assigned to early in his career. He was one step away from being promoted to Ordinal, and at that time he was ready to do anything to achieve that.A drabble about Ordinal Kayn getting his start through questionable means and the tolls it has taken on his mental health.





	Regret

**Author's Note:**

> I was watching crime shows with my mom and it gave me the idea to right this. I'ts a little dark so please don't read it if you are uncomfortable with the things I have tagged. Enjoy!

Oh, the things he’d done to become Ordinal. Those memories haunted him; sitting in the back of his mind as a constant reminder of his desperation for power. Usually they wouldn’t have bothered him, no matter how gruesome and immoral they were, but after marrying Jarvan and having a family of his own he looked back on the atrocities he’d committed in disgust. 

One instance in particular that he recalled so vividly was a mission he was assigned early in his career. He was one step away from being promoted to Ordinal, and at that time he was ready to do _anything _to achieve that. He was under the command of Ordinal Valkyrie, a strong and burly man with a large crimson lions mane. Scars poked out from under his uniform form whatever exposed skin was there; a greataxe resting on his back. He was born from the proud warriors of Bolor, a military city in southern Targon. He moved to the Empire to make a name for himself, and so he did. He was known as the Soul Crusher. For an Ordinal it was not a good look to have a nickname with such negative context, but that man cared not. And what was worse, was that he truly lived up to that name.

They landed on a remote part of Navori, located in the northeastern reaches of the galaxy. A group of anti-imperialists took refuge within a local village and it was their task to find and apprehend the rebels, bringing them back to the Empire to face trial. However, every soldier aboard their ship knew their Ordinal well. They knew none of those rebels would make it back to the Empire. But Kayn did not know this, for he was not a regular among Valkyrie’s crew. He was merely here for his promotion, that was all.

“Any threat, especially a dirty turncoat, will feel the wrath of the Empire.” Is what he would always say. It mattered not that one agreed with him, it only mattered if the job got done the way Valkyrie wanted. Ignore the Emperor, abide by your Ordinal.  Kayn had never agreed with Valkyrie and he made it very apparent, but Valkyrie couldn’t touch him because of his ties to to the Emperor. The Targonians face grew red whenever Kayn was in his line of sight. He was competition. He would get in the way.

But with Valkyrie presiding over his promotion, Kayn needed to bite the bullet and suck up to the man, heeding to his every call. It was infuriating, but it was needed.

Navori consisted of vast Savannah with the occasional dense jungle. Water sources were centered around these jungles, and so were their civilizations. The Navori people were more primitive, relying heavily on their natural resources and environment; a stark contrast to the technological prowess of the modern man. 

Landing in a clearing outside the village, Ordinal Valkyrie and his men strode over to the main gates, if one could even call them that. A simple arch made of rotting wood with foreign glyphs carved into it’s sides, stood at the entrance to the village, as if to welcome those who came- or ward them off. They marched in, Valkyrie demanded to see their leader. No one dare opposed him and quickly a small elderly man was ushered out of one of the nearby huts. He looked to the Ordinal who towered feet above him, and politely greeted him.

But Valkyrie was not one for pleasantries. He demanded to know the whereabouts of the rebels who were rumored to have been hiding among the villagers; the elder denied this claim, reassuring the Targonian that no such people had entered their humble village. The Demaxian soldiers sighed in grief; some turning away to gather themselves, others shaking their heads with a sour expression upon their faces. But Kayn stood among his peers unwavered. He didn’t know what was about to happen, but later he realized, he was powerless to stop it.

Or was he? 

Looking back he could have done anything to halt Valkyrie’s actions, but his obsession for gaining power clouded his judgement and let Valkyrie do as he pleased. The next few moments were the most gruesome he had ever witnessed in his whole career, and that was saying something. Kayn had killed before; had taken the lives of both guilty and innocent, but always within reason. He never over did it- never killed purely for sport.

Valkyrie had his soldiers gather the inhabitants of the village; dragging women by their hair and throwing children over their shoulders. Any man who acted up was kicked to the ground and beaten until he fell in line. Kayn was fortunate enough not to engage in these activities, as Valkyrie wanted him to stand next to him and act as an adviser of sorts. He grimaced at the sight. Desperate mothers and crying children looking up to him with tearful eyes as they passed, begging him for aid. Yet he could not give them what they wished. 

The burly Ordinal watched his men like a hawk, his gaze piercing through any who questioned his methods. Finally, he lent down to Kayn and without looking him in the eyes, smiled. “Seeing as how you are going to be promoted after this mission, allow me to teach you one thing.”

Kayn raised a brow, glancing to the man beside him. “Is that so? How kind of you, Ordinal.” He stated flatly, not at all thankful for his sudden generosity. 

Valkyrie laughed before raising a hand to his mouth, emitting a high pitched whistle. The soldiers all spun their heads to look at him. “Gather them to the center of town and stand them up in rows of five.” He looked back to Kayn and put an arm around his shoulder. “Come with me, Major.” 

The Ordinal guided Kayn to where they had forcefully gathered the villagers and gestured to them all. “Among these innocent villagers are traitors to the Empire. Yet, they will not come forward and so we must weed them out.”

“So this is an interrogation?” Kayn asked, surveying the people being put into orderly lines.  


“Of sorts.” Valkyrie smirked, a dangerous glint in his crimson eyes.  


After the villagers had been sorted, Valkyrie left Kayn’s side and walked before them. “My friends, I am Ordinal Valkyrie of the Demaxian Empire and I am here in search of rebel soldiers who have committed grave sins against the Emperor. Those sinners are currently hiding among your friends and family here, so if you have noticed a suspicious individual or stranger within your village, please, speak up now so we may reprimand them.”

The villagers looked around themselves, meeting the gazes of their neighbors; nothing but confusion in their expressions. As suspected, no one came forward. Valkyrie sighed. “You must understand, if you are purposely hiding the identity of a rebel soldier and you are found out, you will be tried in the Empire. A crime such as that has the same penalties as if you were the rebel yourself.” 

Still, no one came forward. Kayn noticed a young man fidgeting in the fourth line but decided to leave it be for now. After a few moments of silence he watched as the Ordinal huffed, nodding to a soldier standing beside the first five villagers in line. The soldier grabbed a mans shoulder and forced him down onto his knees, demanding the other four do the same. Valkyrie crouched down in front of a woman on the very left, cupping a her chin and forced her to look him in the eye. “There are rebel soldiers hiding among you. Who are they?”

The woman shook her head, breathing heavily. “I-I don’t know. I don’t pay attention to anyone- I-I have three children-”

Valkyrie stood back up, not bothering to let her finish as he took his plasma pistol out of his holster and pointed it at the woman’s head. Her eyes widened but before she could beg him to stop he pulled the trigger. Sanguine danced across the hard dirt, a child screams, the people beside her weep. He moved to the next person, a young boy about thirteen years of age. “There are rebel soldiers hiding among you. Who are they?”

The boy opened his mouth many times, trying to speak, but not being able to get anything out. The Ordinal aimed his pistol, but this time Kayn stepped forward. “Ordinal.” He called, walking right up to the man. “He is but a _child_.” He hissed.

Valkyrie sighed and stood back up, looking down to the Demaxian. “Major Kayn, listen closely. This is your first lesson. You must do everything in your power to get the information you need. It is not about what you feel about a situation- it is about whether or not you can obtain what the Empire wants.” But before Kayn could retort the man pulled the trigger. 

He stood in disbelief, eyes wide as he stared down to the lifeless body of the young boy he failed to save. The others blood pooling at his feet, mixing in with the red of the previous victim. Kayn looked to the next in line, an elderly man who had shut his eyes tightly to avoid seeing the carnage. Valkyrie pushed Kayn out of the way and glared down to the elder. “There are rebel soldiers hiding among you. Who are they?”

The old man said nothing. Valkyrie pulled the trigger.

The next one in line was a child. _A child_. She looked no more than five years old. She stood there, shaking intensely but froze when Valkyrie stopped before her. She slowly looked up, tears rolling down her cheeks; long brown hair in disarray. “There are rebel soldiers hiding among you. Who are they?”

She looked at him with wide eyes; she probably didn’t even understand what he was saying. But no matter her age, Valkyrie looked like he wouldn’t show an ounce of mercy. The girl continued to stare, Valkyrie raised his arm-

“Ordinal Valkyrie!” Kayn raised his voice, moving between the child and the Ordinal. “She is a_child_. She knows _nothing-_”

“She knows _something_.” Valkyrie interrupted, “She would not be quivering if she were not hiding information-”  


“She is scared! She watched three people she knew be murdered in front of her and you expect her to_not_ be shaken?” Kayn was beginning to lose his composure- something someone striving to be an Ordinal should not do. But how could he not react in such a way? This. This was not what the Empire stood for- not how the Emperor would have wanted his army to act. 

Valkyrie was a strong Ordinal, and although he gained the name Soul Crusher, there were never any horrific incidents like this in his records. Now that Kayn was seeing this in person, it must have been that Valkyrie forced his men to stay quiet and killed all the witnesses. It was the only explanation. Kayn felt sick to his stomach- If only Jarvan knew.

The Ordinal put a hand on Kayn’s shoulder and squeezed tightly, causing the Major to wince in pain. “The rebels are cowards. They hide among the villagers and watch them die one by one until either they die or are outed. In a sense, these murders are their fault. Not mine. Now,”

He spun Kayn around to face the young girl and placed the pistol in his hand. “Shoot her.”

The Demaxian grit his teeth. “Are you crazy?”

“Shoot her. That’s an order, Major Kayn.”

Kayn looked down to the girl, the hope that filled her eyes when he intervened now gone and replaced with a newfound horror. She began to sob, crying loudly for all in line to hear. He raised the pistol. He needed to become Ordinal. He aimed. He needed to become Ordinal. 

At the last second he switched his target to the middle aged man in the fourth row he spotted earlier and pulled the trigger. The man cried out in pain before falling to the ground. There was a moment of silence before Kayn slammed the gun back into Valkyrie’s hand, walking over to the body. He rummaged through the corpse before finding a medallion; one that all rebel soldiers wore to symbolize their involvement. He lifted it up, walked back and threw it to Valkyrie’s feet. 

“Mission accomplished. We’re done here.” He sneered, turning to the little girl and ushering her off into the arms of another villager.

“That’s one way to find the culprit.” The Ordinal smirked. He then pat Kayn on the back and gestured towards their ship. “Nice work, Major Kayn. Or should I say Ordinal Kayn? Head back to the ship, we’ll clean up here.”

Kayn shrugged the brute off. “So I am an Ordinal now?” He asked, wanting reassurance. Wanting confirmation. 

“We’ll talk about it on the ship.” Valkyrie turned around and walked towards the villagers, ordering them to go back to their homes. 

But Kayn noticed something off. A few of the soldiers standing around the Ordinal made a signal with their hands- one he didn’t know. One that worried him. Contrary to Valkyrie’s words, he seemed to be cornering them with the formation his soldiers were in. ‘We’ll clean up here.’ The Ordinal’s words replayed in his mind over and over again, until Kayn’s eyes widened in realization. He was going to wipe them out.

You reached your desired status. You have no need of him anymore. He bit his lip.

Kayn rushed forward, unsheathing a dagger from his thigh and lodging it in one of the soldiers necks. Blood sprayed out of the gaping wound, coating the left side of Kayn’s face before he dropped the body to the ground. He pulled the knife from the corpse and threw it at the next soldier, hitting him right between the eyes. By the time he took out two soldiers, three more joined the fray alongside Valkyrie.

The third one rushed at him, slamming into his gut and pinning him against the wall of one of the huts. A mistake on his part. Kayn grinned, whispering “Hush…” before his body was engulfed in a purple hue and he sunk backwards into the stone wall. The soldier gasped, stepping back. But then Kayn’s hand reached out from the wall and gripped his neck, crushing it slowly. He gasped for air, clawing at Kayn’s hand, but to no avail. A loud crack was heard and the man went limp.

Kayn let him drop to the ground and disappeared once more. The last two soldiers cowered in fear, never seeing such a power before. One of them dropped his gun and put his hands up, begging to Kayn to forgive him. The other was about to follow suit until he watched a bullet lodged itself in the soldiers head. 

“DIRTY TURNCOATS! COWARDS!” Valkyrie cried, grabbing the only soldier by the head and smashing it into the ground, a loud crushing noise was heard as blood filtered out of the helmet. “SURRENDERING TO THE ENEMY? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU! FIGHT ME, COWARD! COME OUT AND FACE ME!”  


Silence.

“I see how it is!” Valkyrie began to laugh. “Then I will resort to _other_ measures.” He mumbled, turning towards the shaking villagers. He stomped up to them, eyeing the little girl from earlier before ripping her from the grip of one of the villagers. The girl screamed, the villagers did as well. One woman lunged forward to try and get the child back, but Valkyrie back handed her and she slumped to the ground. He held the girl by the neck and lifted her up, her voice strained as she tried to cry for help.   


“Come out _Ordinal Kayn_, or I kill this innocent child!” His voice was loud, his eyes crazed. He smiled- the thrill of the hunt. “I SAID COME OUT-”

Valkyrie paused. He coughed; blood pouring from his mouth. He looked down and saw a blade protruding from his chest. It was now that he felt the presence of someone behind him. The Ordinal laughed weakly. “Only cowards… Hide in the shadows…” He got out before Kayn ripped out the blade.

The girl fell to the ground, bruising beginning to form along her neck. Valkyrie slumped beside her. She quickly got up, coughing violently as she ran to Kayn; wrapping her arms around his leg and crying. “No. I just used them to my advantage.”

The Demaxian put a hand on the girls back, but the sound of heavy footfalls brought his attention back towards their vessel. Reserve soldiers stood in formation, weapons raised as they gazed upon the carnage. But a figure, dressed in a more refined uniform than that of a common foot soldier, pushed them aside to stand at their front. The Captain of the ship, Captain Almyra, stood there with hands behind her back. “Major Kayn.”

“_Ordinal _Kayn.” He corrected.

She looked down to Valkyrie’s dead body and sighed. “Yes, well, we _do _need a new Ordinal now, I suppose.” The Captain sighed, “I’m glad he’s gone. He was a horrible and rotten man. I just hope you will be different.”  


Kayn pat the little girls back, prompting her to look up at him. 

“I won’t be this reckless.”  


* * *

Explaining what had happened in Navori to Jarvan was… A grueling task. Kayn, as well as Valkyrie’s former crew, testified before the council. The Emperor stared at him in horror the whole time, the members of the council shaking their heads; chastising themselves for not seeing Valkyrie’s true intent sooner. The Conference discussing the Navori Incident was recorded and broadcast throughout the Empire, doing wonders for Kayn’s new promotion. It cemented his ascension as Ordinal and solidified his popularity among the Demaxian populace.

Ordinal Kayn- the bringer of true Justice to the Empire.

But behind closed doors, Kayn wept in Jarvans arms. His tough guy persona completely shattered by the death of that mother, that child, that old man, those soldiers who were merely following orders. The near death of that little girl. Jarvan comforted him as best he could, but eventually had to resort to leaving him alone to recuperate his thoughts.

Kayn didn’t start his new job as Ordinal until a few days later. Jarvan had insisted that he take some time off after the incident to recover. The Emperor had tried to convince his friend to take an entire month off, but Kayn fought with him about it until they agreed on just a week. During his time off, Kayn realized just how badly he needed it. His mind wasn’t the same after that- a newfound sense of duty and responsibility overcame him as he thought back on Valkyrie’s actions.

Kayn walked into the loading dock, Captain Almyra and the crew standing outside Kayn’s new ship. “Good morning, Ordinal Kayn.” She greeted.

“Good morning, Captain.” He greeted back, saluting the soldiers who he passed.  


“Shall I run you through the itinerary for the day?”  


“Please do.”  


Never again. Not without reason. Not unless he needed to.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! Tell me how you liked it! <3


End file.
